something that i surfed

was totally doing nothing today.. after some morning madness.. and been surfing net and chit-chat on msn .. and i came across a site.. i decided to put some stuff over here...

U sure?

Ugly mum goes to the shop with her 2 kids.

The shopkeeper asks her are they twins?

NO why do you ask,do you think they look alike?

No says the shopkeeper I just cant belive you have been fucked twice.

Confused Doctor Visit

A man goes to the doctor and the visit goes like this._

MAN: Doc, I think I am gay._

DOCTOR: What makes you think you’re gay?_

MAN: Well, my dad just announced, to our family, that HE is gay._

DOCTOR: Just because your father is gay dosn’t mean that you are. It’s not hereditary._

MAN: But Doc, I have two uncles and they are BOTH gay._

DOCTOR: Well, that’s just a coincidence. It’s NOT hereditaty._

MAN: But I have three brothers, and they are ALL gay._

DOCTOR: Damn son! Doesn't anyone in your family like pussy?!_

MAN: Well, sure. My sister does!!

and for the last one...

Men vs Women

A family is at the dinner table.

The son asks his father, "Dad, how many kinds of ‘boobies’ are there?”

The father, surprised, answers.

"Well, son, there’s three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like onions."

"Onions?", said the son.

"Yes, you see them and they make you cry."

This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, "Mom, how many kinds of ‘willies’ are there?"

The mother smiles and answers.

"Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In his twenties, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and strong. In his thirties and forties, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree."

"A Christmas tree?", said the daughter.

"Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are for decoration only."

that's all folks